Do you feel like you may be stuck in a codependent relationship?  If any of these statements are true, you just might be:

  • Your girlfriend’s jealousy makes it impossible for you to interact normally with any women in your life.

  • Your girlfriend has an intense fear of rejection and abandonment.
  • You girlfriend depends entirely on you for her happiness and validation.
  • Your girlfriend says she can’t live without you.
  • Your girlfriend manipulates you with her emotions.
  • You feel responsible for your girlfriend’s happiness.
  • You suppress your emotions to avoid confrontations.
  • You feel like you are sacrificing the life you want so you can make her happy.
  • You feel trapped and want to escape.
  • You feel guilty about thoughts of abandoning her.

It’s important to recognize that relationship are a two-way street and you, the man, are no less responsible for the unhealthy dynamic than your girlfriend is. Your own behavior can also be labeled as “codependent” because being a codependent partner in a relationship can have two meanings: one partner (the “taker”) feels needy and dependent, while the other (the “caretaker”) has an inflated sense of responsibility and oversensitivity to the other’s demands.  They say opposites attract, and it’s certainly true that opposing codependent personalities attract each other.

In codependent relationships, both partners may have complex histories that seem to justify their behavior. If you’re a man stuck in a manipulative, jealous, and volatile relationship, you must realize that your happiness is worth the effort it takes to move on. So what’s holding you back?

You may feel trapped in your relationship, and even though you’re unhappy, your avoidant tendencies keep you from following through with a break-up. Many men wait years or even a lifetime without taking action.  It’s important that you don’t waste time planning how to break up, and just do it.  The longer you wait to break up your codependent relationship, the more time you both invest and the more complicated it gets.

You may find counseling helpful, but make sure you tell the counselor that you want to end the relationship, because many of them operate from the assumption that the relationship should be fixed.

If you’d like to leave your relationship, but you’re not sure how, get my break up guide.  It will help you:

1) Identify the dysfunctional aspects of your relationship
2) Establish your right to leave an unhealthy relationship
3) Walk you through the break-up process in the most pain-free way.

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Filed under: Get Your Ex Back

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